Pain has a weird way of knocking at my door and trying to change me. Her cold, colorless heavy air and her overwhelming, sheer weight would almost always slow down my pace, make me sit on my chair, and force to me my unwanted introspective questions.

My frustrated poetic expressions aside, I would like to think and write about the encounter I had with this one question:

“Is what I’m doing (i.e. starting, building, and running a startup) at this young age worth it?”

I’ve read hundreds of books and videos and I believe there would be people standing on two sides of differing stances:

At one side, there would be people who would discourage what I’m doing with a burning passion. They’d say I’ll miss a part of my life, I can’t enjoy my 20s, I’ll miss knocking opportunities, I’ll be different, probably even hated, I’ll “eat glass”, I won’t be able to enjoy a girlfriend, and so on and so forth.
On the other side would be the people that would say that I’m extremely lucky.

But to answer the question, I think we have to dig deeper than that. It was then I came upon three things that helped me answer this question.

 

Here are three things that I believe sheds light to this question:

Thinking in a wider and higher scope of existence.
Everything happened, happens, and will happen for a reason, or so that’s what my very finite understanding of the sovereignty of God stands to believe. Knowing that I’m only a speck of dust in the Universe brings me considerable comfort. And it brings me great hope of the things that happened, are happening, and will happen.

My dream is no longer my own.
It would be selfish to consider my dream as my dream only and no-one else’s; a dream that I can just throw away when I want to. That would probably be okay if I was still a child, but that is no longer the case. People have joined me in my quest. People who are significantly better than me, who are far more experienced, skillful, and talented. People have already spent their precious irredeemable  time, money, and opportunities because of me. I am no longer alone in this. Of course the weight of this responsibility is not light, but this is also something that I find I could always take great strength from.

Being mindful of the future.
I may not have the ability to peek into the future, but I believe that we have the responsibility to create a better future not for ourselves but for those who will come after us, our children, our grandchildren, our grand-grandchildren.

 

 

So is starting a company while in your 20s worth it?

To those who want to stand up and make a dent in the world: Yes.
To the dreamers and idealists who believe we should dream for everyone’s sake: Yes.
To the futurists who want to pave a better future for our children and grandchildren: Yes.
To those who would sacrifice present happiness for a long-term vision: Yes.
To those who are different: Yes.

To the crazy ones: Yes.

 


 

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I have my fair share of unlikely struggles.

Having lived through 20+ life years, I have experienced some of the weird battles that my fellow INTJ brethren are apparently destined to experience:

The thirst for improvement…

The quest for perfection…

The rules of sociality…

But one of the long battles that has also been stirring inside my brain is religious faith.

Together with my INTP cousins, we, the INTJ and INTP, represent the “personalities of logic”. Our brains are simply wired for it. We are skeptics. We are thinkers. Our brains are wired for reason.

But not that I am struggling with faith that I reject faith. Quite the contrary.

Because I am a Christian, and I still am.

Because no matter the depths and the lengths of my thinking and seeking–for the roots and purpose of life and how the world came to be and how it should be–I am still grounded on the solid rock of belief where an all-powerful Creator exists:

That everything in our realm of space and time was created and is being governed….

By Something which our physical bodies are not even able to comprehend…

By Someone Who is of greater class and thinking ability than us humans…

Because science and logic doesn’t necessarily clash with “God things“. I believe they support each other. That God blessed us with the gift of science and logic for us humans to experience a glimpse of His majesty.

Because the moment we believe to think that our ways are higher
is the moment we realize that we have become highly arrogant creatures.