On Fear

I think I am well acquainted with fear.

I have heard friends say that I am too courageous, probably nearing to the degree of recklessness. I make decisions involving obvious risks with personal consequences. I make decisions that would make my knees and jaw tremble. I desperately move forward, making decisions that will push my self towards the outside of my comfort zone.

Because I am against fear, I will attempt to write some of my thoughts about it.

Fear Amplifies Humanity

I believe I can achieve any thing as long as I set my eyes on it. And it is not just me, but I heard mentors say that I’m the type who’ll excel at whatever thing that I’ll set my eyes on.

But fear. Oh, fear.

Fear is one of the many things that makes me realize something most important: That I am just human. That I am dust, weak, stupid, fragile, sick, dependent. And luckily, this fact helps me to stir my ship away from the pit of conceit. It helps me to bring me to my knees. It amplifies my humanity. It makes known to me the great disparity between man and God, and with it reminds me of my great dependence to God.

Fear Shows Direction

The human brain is amazing. It has different regions, with different functions, with different natures, with different “sub-brains”. And out of all the “sub-brains” of our whole human brain, the one which I blame to be the cause of fear the most is the “Reptilian Brain”. The Reptilian Brain is the brain responsible for giving us “instinct” and is most attributed for our survival.

But the thing with the “Reptilian Brain” is that it can be really selfish.

It clouds sound judgement. It twists logic. It pollutes morals and ideals. It makes our vision short-sighted and our decisions weak, concerned only for the Now instead of looking ahead for a greater better Future.

That is why the moment that I notice myself feeling fear is most of the time the moment that I know what action to pursue: That I should all the more do these things that makes me feel fear.

When confronting my own fears, my inner dialogue usually goes on like this:

Pyl: “Do you feel fear?”

Pyl: “Well. My knees are trembling. I definitely feel fear.”

Pyl: “Why do I feel fear?”

Pyl: “I feel fear because I don’t know what will happen. What if I’ll embarrass myself? What if I’ll make enemies and make people dislike me, even hate me? What if I’ll be alone? What if I’ll fail real hard?”

Pyl: “Why am I afraid? Didn’t Jesus said that Perfect Love casts out fear? Then why am I afraid? Shouldn’t I not be afraid of evil even through the valleys of death, because His rod and His staff gives comfort? Does running away from this justify this fear? Or do I want to just run away so I can selfishly save my own skin? Why this fear???

Rationalizing against fear can work. It allows me to detach myself from the feeling and allow me to see the hard facts. It makes me stand strong despite with trembling knees. Also, knowing God’s words on fear is a tremendous boon.

This is then why fear gives direction when decisions are hard to make.

Fear Gives Courage

Without admitting fear I think there can be no development of courage.

It is when we realize that we are afraid that we can identify our self. And then from there take steps to quell our shortcomings and develop our character.

Of course, I think fear can be never ending. But I also think fear is something that is worth fighting against.

Finally, there is absolutely every reason to feel fear for things. But I also know something that will make a great daily reminder: That our most deep seated fear should be reserved and be realized for Someone most worthy.

 

 

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